One Little, Two Little, Three Little...

We are the Harpeth Indians. Named for that auspicious tribe that inhabited the banks of the river of the same name. That river flows through Kingston Springs where the other part of my life takes place. I am the Art teacher in the Middle School and it brings me great joy most days. However when my Principal Shannon Schliwa came and asked me to take on a new project I had my doubts. It all started with this bat problem we had in the school.... Bats and Middle Schoolers really don't mix and to tell you the truth if the kids had been a little quieter or the bats made less guano the two would have never run into one another. Bats are nocturnal and if left undisturbed they will hang folded up, upside down all day, flying out at night to gleefully scoop up bugs and such. Anyway I digress... They had to "remove " those bats-for safety sake, and because the bats had moved into pockets in the cinder box walls, specialists were alerted. I had visions of "Men in Black" sporting shades with greasy hair and tied up wing tips-but the truth is I never saw the specialists. I did however see the traps they set and the bats that were caught up in them. There was also a large size bat vacuum that was to suck the varmints out of there hiddie holes. It was truly bizarre see one of them- furry rodent with floppy leather ears crawling around on the gym floor using it 's folded leathery wings to scoot with. He looked up at us on this occasion and made a sad little bat noise. All his family and friends were caught up in the cage but he had managed to stay awake and escape. They seemed to be cheering him on in their little batty screeches and cries. For all his bravery he was still just a small pitiful rodent forcibly removed from a good home into the strangely flat and slick environment of the gym floor. On closer inspection we could see he had somehow picked up a piece of silver duck tape and it was clinging to his fur. Whether he was trying to free himself from the tape or his situation, he was extending his pitiful little nubby winglets out on the floor in front of himself and then scrunching himself up to that point and then starting again. Bats obviously were not meant to walk. It was such an obviously difficult and awkward movement for him but he slowly made ground and the tape fell away. Suddenly freed, he soared majestically up and off into the air. DRAMA! Women react hysterically to the most unusual things. I have actual seen grown women stand on chairs at the sight of a tiny little mouse! WELL.....you can well imagine the effect this bat had on my colleagues. They went slap wild! What I thought it was fascinating was causing great disstress tothese adventure seekers! I couldn't bring myself to watch my little friend for trying to witness the dramatic hissie fits being performed in ritual on that gym floor. I never did get to see just where he went or if he escaped. It was much later when the gym was declared bat-free but still could not be used until the guano had been removed. Which brings me finally around to the point of all of this....To clean the gym they brought in a lift to reach up into the rafters. This lift was sort of like a combination of scaffolding and a cherry picker and it ran around on big fat wheels. It was through this large piece of equipment that Mrs. Schliwa thought we had a large opportunity. 20 feet up on the far wall of the gym was the Indian crest of the school. The head of the Indian must have been about 3-4 feet tall, and had originally been done with an air brush. My job if I decided to take it (can't you hear the Mission Impossible theme now?) was to crawl up the ladder to the top of the platform, lift it up 20 feet in the air and repaint the crest-Ha ha ha talk about the fear of falling! And to make matters worst I had never painted a portrait before-let alone one of a "Native American"So summing it up...I was to paint a realistic 3-4 foot Indian head (among other details) using skin tones I had no experience mixing or using, 20 feet in the air, on a platform that swayed in hula-like movements. Strong prayers were offered before I began. I think there are good reasons there are no photographs taken of me while the work was being done...fear comes across pretty strong in pictures! Once I got going it turned out to be quite invigorating- no chance of falling asleep - fall yes- asleep no!! When it was all said and done with I knew the hand of God was in the work....surely he did bless me with enough of a gift that I can be proud of job we did...Now if I only knew where they took those little bats....

*Disclaimer*Some names and events may have been changed to protect the innocent.

100 Things You Might Not Know About Me

1.While I was trying to set up this blog I got lost(from Gmail) and couldn't find my way back
for 2 weeks!

2. I secretly want to be a computer geek.
3. When I am alone in the car- I sing !
4.Driving by yard sales causes me physical pain.
5. I swam backstroke on a swim team when I was starting High School.
6. When I was in High School girls could not wear pants to school.
7. I love ABBA's music
8. I saw Glen Campbell in concert.(see #47)
9. iphones fascinate me.
10. I believe that electromagnets could be used as an alternative energy source.
11. I had a wicked stepmother who had surprisingly good taste.
12. I can not spell worth a toot. Thank you spell check!
13. I am suspicious of jobs listed in the classified ads.
14. I believe in fairies...I was a lovely purple fairy for many Halloweens.
15. When I was in 3rd grade I wanted to marry Jesus.
16. I captivated by the art of adornment...design, make and wear jewelry. It's all good!
17. White Chocolate cake with white chocolate icing is my absolute favorite.
18. My Mother's name was Jenny Lynn Greer York and she left this earth when I was 3.
19. People who knew my Father tell me I look just like him.
20. I have no desire to go to Europe.
21. My High School art teacher was a drag queen in Nashville on the weekends.
22. I love staying up late at night-but I feel guilty the next day.
23. People who knew my Mother tell me I look just like her.
24. I consider it a luxury to piddle!
25. I get my best ideas in the shower.
27. I have a younger sister who earned a PHD, sings opera and teaches voice in San Diego.
28. I have been married 3 times.
29. When I lived in San Antonio we had scorpions in the garage!
30. I HATE CALVES LIVER!!!!
31. When I was in 4th grade my Father brought home a shark he caught in the ocean.
32. I love a mystery but I'm not too keen on surprises.
33. I use to smoke cigarettes back in the dark ages and now I can't stand the smell!
34. I love to camp.
35. I LOVE Connell Austin and I always will.
36. I am not motivated by money,but sometimes I wish I were.
37. I have a Tarzan fetish.
38. I am addicted to point and click escape games!
39. I never had trouble losing weight until I hit 40.
40. I grew up thinking that McDonalds' and ice tea were good for you.
41. I have always wanted to fly...not in a plane...just in the air.
42. I have a terrible fear of falling...as my friend Beverly puts it.
43. In my 20's I lived in Hawaii and sold fur coats for a living.
44. Streaking was the rage when I was in college.
45. Time is not my friend.
46. I sometimes wonder if I lived alone would I could I be more organized?

47. I have seen Fleetwood Mac, Yes, James Gang, Joni Mitchell, 3Dog Night, BillJoel, Lynard Skynard, Leo Kottke, REO, John Mayall, Crosby,Stills,Nash and Young, Neil Young, John Cougar Mellencamp, Cindy Lauper, The Bangles,Kansas, Barry Mantello, Jimmy Buffett, Emerson Lake and Palmer,Jackson Brown,Genesis, Foreigner,Journey,HarryChapin in concert ...and probably a few more.... I love rock and roll!

48. I can roller skate but I can not water ski. (you can tune a piano but can you tune a fish?)
49. When I entered the 8th grade I was placed in advanced French because I had taken 6 years of Spanish. "Que"(K) means what in Spanish. "Oui" (we) means yes in French. I failed miserably.
50.I attended a dance in college where 2 other girls were wearing the same formal I was.
51. I am the worlds worst at keeping in touch with others. see #100
52. I have 5 incredible step children, who although I wasn't there when they were born I'd claim everyone of them as my own.
53. I was raised by my Maternal Grandparents from the time I was in 8th grade.
54.When I was in High School the girls all worn mens' Levi jeans. They were just beginning to put out Chic jeans.
55. At my first boy-girl dance I wore short white gloves and ringlets.
56. In college we never dreamed it would cost more than $10.00 to go to ANY concert.
57. I can still remember the day I walked into a record store and all the records were gone -they only sold CDs!
58. In 3rd Grade JFK was assassinated and people cried in the street. All the TV coverage was in black and white, gratefully.We were never the same after that.
59. I have never had a good sense of age-mine or anyone elses.
60. I terrible time listening to people who don't give me the same respect.
61. In 3rd grade I saw The Beatles on The Ed Sullivan Show in black and white and my life changed forever.
62. I have never been to a hockey game.
63. I am a P.A.D.I. Dive Master.
64. I started at Murray State University straight out of High School. I was 17 and it was the first time I had ever been away from home longer than a week.
65. I sang in the choir in High School
66. I was President of my Pledge Class at Murray State for ADPi.
67. I won a ride in a hot air balloon. The operate told me if I didn't bend my knees when we landed I would have broken legs. Talk about a heighten sense of fear!(see #42)
68. I get motion sickness. Totally barfy man!
69. I have and inquisitive mind. It prevents me from taking anything at surface value.see#78
70. I was there the day that Mtv came on the air. Oh Martha Quinn where did you go??
71. I broke my arm in front of the army hospital in San Antonio,TX.
72. I saw the USS Alabama go through the locks of the Panama Canal.
73. I like to fish.
74. I enjoy my own company and keeping myself entertained. It doesn't take much.
75. They removed my tonsils in 1st grade and it was a dreadful experience.
76. We lived one block from Tennessee Tech Training School and we walked to school in the first and second grade.
77. I took the Evelyn Woods Speed Reading Course.
78. I am easily distracted.
79. My intentions are always good....
80. The only tennis shoes for girls when I was in school were Keds. We wore Bass Wejuns.
81. When I was a teenager the only hair products we had were hairspray or Dippidy Do.
82. I have never been locked up in jail.
83. I was an antiques dealer for several years.
84. I had my car stolen while I was out scuba diving.
85. I have grand spurts of creative inspiration when it comes to cooking.
86. My Grandmother took me to the doctor for poison ivy when I was in High School. I was so totally covered in it he accused of running through the woods naked...the only thing that saved me was that my Grandmother had it too.
87. They invented Pantyhose after I started High School.
88. I started to seriously listen to music the summer of '67.
89. I was the bridal consultant at Lee's Bridal for about 3 years.
90. I love horseback riding.
91. I have had 2 total hip replacements.
92.Yes, I do believe I could do a better job than the current President...that doesn't mean I want the job.
93. I love to knot pearls. Shoot I just love pearls period ,,,I'm a pearl girl!
94. I saw Yul Brenner live in "The King and I".
95. I bought a Wii Fit on the advise of a friend and now I am stiff as a board- it is a good thing.
96 I HATE Rap Music. It was made up for people who can not sing. You call that music???
97. I have owned 6 Volkswagens --- the only nice thing Hitler ever did.
98. At one low point in my life my nickname was "Lizard"
99. I take rejection VERY poorly!
100. I am pretty prompt answering email but, I can never find a stamp....I have the hardest time sending letters through the mail.....whew!