The Principle Centered Life

The mentoring program at school for anti-social kids is using Sean Covey's The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. It is right on target. He says that instead of centering our lives on work, heroes, friends, stuff, etc. We should have a principle centered life. Principles like honesty, service, love, hard work, respect, gratitude, moderation, fairness, integrity, loyalty, and responsibility. it takes faith to live by principles, especially when you see people around you cutting corners,and being dishonest or even selfish. But you will never regret living a life with and holding to your principles.
The one book that has truly made such a difference for me is The 4 Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. I have to admit I heard about the book on Oprah but it was way before The Secret. and all that hokus pokus stuff. Anyway, The 4 Agreements are ones we make with ourselves to help define us as human beings. The agreements are:
1 Be Impeccable with your word
2 Don't take Anything personally
3 Don't make Assumptions
4 Always do your best.
These simple little "rules" have helped me more than I can say. Not that I am sucessful everyday. When dealing with students, or my dear Connell, or even Eddie the obese Jack Russell for that matter- If I start to get frustrated I try to back up and think why am I reacting that way? It usually boils down to me being territorial or taking something way too personal because I feel insecure about whatever is going on. Most of the behaviorial issues in my class are due to the same silly things and if I can take a student out in the hall and reason things out and let them know we are on the same side, the problem disappears.
I tell my students that they won't ever get in trouble for being too nice, and that there are enough people in the world willing to tear us down and find fault but in class we are going to build each other up. I also feel we spend way too much time and attention on dealing with people being offending by silly little things. We as a nation have become too accommodating to those who are easily offended and have traded our some of our principles just so we don't create contention. I say lighten up! Get over yourself! People are not sitting around plotting your demise. Love yourself and love those around you, especially the ones that are a little harder to care for...